Lopez Blogs

Oh me oh my, it's been a long exhausting week so straight on with the various things i meant to blog about but once again didn't get round to...

• The X Factor is back! And Biffa Tweedy is a judge instead of Shazbot Osbourne. And it's as much a parody of itself as it ever was. And as manipulative and evil as ever. Yet I cannot bring myself NOT to watch. So there were some dreadful people. Then there were some good people. And then came the sob stories. Rachel (who was actually quite likeable and very good indeed) was done a HUGE disservice by ITV overplaying the fact that she spent her teenage years shooting up and getting pregnant (26 and 5 kids) when she would've sailed through on her voice alone; stretching for a story when some girl with an average voice gets through because she's from that town where all the kids committed suicide and frankly they were probably terrified of saying no to her for that very reason; Austin Drage who was on that dreadful lets make boys become girl popstars show gets through and cries; and then - THEN! - poor Nikk from Phixx (above) is totally set up (i bet if you checked he would've been asked to attend) by saying it's his last chance ever (nice line spoon fed to him by Simon) and he was auditioning along side Cheryl 6 years ago, and needs that chance again. He is actually fairly decent - they've put through worse people, but to make Cheryl seem sympathetic (she did bash some toilet attendants head off the porcelain bowl) they turn him away, his heart breaks, and Cheryl sobs. How much more fucking sympathy does she need? Her husband fucked the hairdresser! Anyway, bring on the live shows :) Oh! The Bitch Factor is back! Brillo!
• Stuart got voted out of Big Brother. I doubt any of the housemates will notice. What was brilliant was when he decided to dive into the crowd and they all moved out the way, so he landed like a cartoon character, SPLATT, on the concrete. He was clearly in pain during his exit interview. I feel mean tittering. Bring on the magazine photoshoots. Dale's were rubbish, thanks to evil Jen being in most of them. Honestly, I don't know which that skanky ho is milking harder - her chance at "fame" or Dale's cock...
• Madonna turned 50, looked it, and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of my fave people posted various iconic poses of her. Also, what is a possibly a demo from the Ray of Light era conveniently leaked. Oh it's an Abba cover - whose huge right now? Abba. Hmmm. Anyway, Madge's version of Like An Angel is actually quite pretty. Nice to know Maddy has seen the softer side of Sears...
• A new music channel launched in England. Not only did it have Will Young's new video (see below) but also the first showing of Kylie's X2008. Ruffle My Feathers and Flowers should SO be Kylie's massive Christmas single...
• I meant to review the following albums but didn't and now can't be bothered so here are very brief opinions on them: The Script (surprisingly american and polished. I like a lot); Little Jackie (about 4 decent single worthy tracks on there, not so sure about the rest); Noah and The Whale (actually probably will get around to this one as I love it!) and LadyHawke (very very good indeed). Van She review coming soon!
• I was pretty sure I wasn't going to like Solange. Then I Decided got to be very good and ditto her new track Sandcastle Disco is quite fine indeed. I blame Dan and Phil for making me like something with a bit of taste and class. Curse you boys :P Don't worry everyone I still love SD :)

THE TOP 21 FIZZYPOP TRACKS OF THE WEEK

21 ~ Jonas Bros, Burning Up
20 ~ Madonna, Give it 2 Me
19 ~ McFly, One For The Radio
18 ~ Madonna, The Beat Goes On (N/E)
17 ~ Keane, Spiralling
16 ~ Daniel Powter, Next Plane Out
15 ~ Pink, So What
14 ~ BWO, The Bells of Freedom
13 ~ Jesse McCartney, It's Over
12 ~ Kylie, The One
11 ~ Jack McManus, You Think I Don't Care
10 ~ Sophie Ellis Bextor, Heartbreak Makes Me A Dancer
09 ~ Alphabeat, Boyfriend
08 ~ Infernal, Downtown Boys
07 ~ Lily Allen, GWB
06 ~ Little Jackie, The Whole World Should Revolve Around Me
05 ~ Bryn Christopher, The Quest
04 ~ William Young, Changes
03 ~ Regina Spektor, The Call
02 ~ Miley Cyrus, 7 Things
01 ~ The Feeling, Join With Us (1 week)
Previous number ones: The Feeling-I Thought It Was Over (4 weeks); David Jordan-Sun Goes Down (4 weeks); Jesse McCartney-Leaving (3 weeks); Madonna-4 Minutes (2 weeks); The Feeling-Without You (4 weeks); BWO-Lay Your Love On Me (3 weeks); Maroon 5 ft Rihanna-Never See Your Face Again (2 weeks); Kylie-The One (3 weeks); Lily Allen-GWB (2 weeks); Miley Cyrus - 7 Things (5 weeks)

Coming next week: VanShe review! A couple more album reviews! Some singles stuff! Not sure what else, but probably fizzy and poptastic :)
Coming in 2 weeks (when on holiday): A 3 day Madonna retrospective and 2 day Erasure special!

• There are two very important single releases that are happening this week. First up is the effortlessly cool Red Blooded Women who are shacking up all over the clubs with the funky remixes to You Made Your Bed. I thought it might be rather difficult to improve on this slinky seductive pop number but I was wrong. They picked up some great remixes along the way and made the weeks cheapest but most brilliant video ever. God i love these dames...
• Also out this week is a rather slick radio remix of Oh Laura's very lovely indeed Release Me. I can't help but feel that this band are still teetering on the edge of something very massive and special indeed. They appeared on Radio 2 this week and just stunned me with the acoustic versions of some of their album's finest tracks. This band fails to do no wrong and yet they are not chart toppers. I sense it is a matter of time. Be prepared. Check out Release Me now. You know you want to. It's the most lovely piece of work since Bic Runga's Sway.
• Props to the junior admin staff at work who "the management" tasked with "extra responsibility" by assigning them the job of coming up with a layout for a new company newsletter (that sounds really patronising but actually it was laziness on our part as no one wanted to do it). They do a bonza job except that it was gently pointed out that "The [insert company name here] Rant" didn't really put across the positive message wanted (I even had to patiently google the meaning of "rant" for them and found "A rant or harangue is a speech or text that does not present a well-researched and calm argument" and "pompous or pretentious talk or writing" Oh my!) Eventually they settled on The ProClaimar which if you knew the name of the company is actually rather brilliant! (It's not really hard to guess after that is it?)
• What the bugger is going on with Timbaland and Madonna is the question on lots of people's lips. Personally I really like Hard Candy. I think it's rather good. I get why people don't think it's a great Madonna album. I think it's a good album regardless of whether it's Madonna or not. But as much as I love Madonna, i'm not as invested in her output as I am with other albums (I've been incredibly disappointed with one Deborah album and two Robbies!) so I'm not too bothered. Really, it is time to move on from Timbaland. For all popstars. Jadion needs to be the new producer of choice :) Though Four Minutes is fucking fantastic still!
• Oh 50 days of Big Brother (Why Bother) and it's getting incredibly dull. There is only so many times you can admire Stuart and Dales bodies (and sometimes dress sense). Darnell has gone slightly mental, Mikey and his washing testicular mass in a drinking cup repulses me, Luke is fucking awful and the rest of them bar Kat, Rachel and Sarah are the sort of egomaniacs you only normally find in the more pretentious London clubs. And everytime Bex is up for eviction, she decides to snog Luke which is repulsive to watch. It's like watching an overstuffed dog pouring over the remains of an emancipated chicken carcuss. Yet I cannot bear to look away :P
• There are lots of lovely Gossip Girl season 2 pics popping up all over the web. It all looks very exciting. You know you love me, xoxo, etc.

Oh. My. Dayz. What a fucking day. Darren got rear ended by a honda civic. I had my worst hayfever day ever. I think i literally fell asleep at my desk for a few minutes today and drooled on my laptop keyboard. And then felt like a drugged up zombie until the news of darrens bump whacked me back into protective mode. Anyway, importantly, darren is fine, the car is fixable and i am back to drugged up zombie mode. But in a moment of clarity today, I have whipped up several mini posts of some of my favourite acts - before I launch into that, here are some highlights from other fleeting and long term obsessions (PS - there are a million and one posts today so you have to scroll down all the way to the bottom of today's date postings to leave a comment or click here!):

• Hurrah! Justice will be served. Evil Jen is up for nomination in Big Brother against Rex. She is 1-33 favourite to go. Apparently her bewitching spell over Dim Dale continues because he told her she won't go because Britain loves an underdog. Oh my! He got part of that description right. Not sure about the "under" bit though...
• And! Has anyone noticed how each week a different girl emerges with shocking behaviour and becomes the house bitch. Week one - Alex Mugabe. Week two - Sylvia. Week Three - Jen. And now Bex. At this rate Kat will be rubbing cookie crumbs into rachel's eyes by saturday...
• Details magazine continues to be brilliant and is now seriously nudging Attitude in the rear to become my second favourite magazine ever (EW still holds my heart). Once again they have a sexy cover star in Christian Bale (I don't find him particularly attractive, but he does have quite a nice almost smile); ace fashion advice about dress down Fridays (my faves? The v neck sweater look. Please skip the boat shoes)and spot on tips about where to "summer" this year - note: Not New York. It is a winter city. Has Carrie Bradshaw taught us nothing???
• Dazpecs and I are going to Florida again in November. Apparently we will be there for what you Americans call "thanksgiving" or "piss off back to britain day". It should be fun. I expect pumpkin pie from Yuri...

NEW MUSIC FROM WILLIAM YOUNG!!!

Thanks to the ever reliable XO, I now know that William Young performed some new music at the weekend at a little festival called Glastonbury. Above is the title track to his forthcoming fourth album Let It Go. Question - if in the USA, a second album is sophomore, does this make Let It Go William's Senior album>? I'm confused. Anyway, it's a gorgeous GORGEOUS laid back ballad that shows how far William has travelled since Pop Idol, yet stayed true to what made me love him in the first place - an elegance in his music both in vocal delivery and melodic beauty. The song itself deals with the point in life or relationships or whatever, where you just can't take it anymore and you either crack up or decide to move on. If I had to compare it, I would say it's a lovely second single reminiscent of All Time Love or the major Leave Right Now. There is a simply charming moment at 2.33 where William (practically smooching with the microphone) does this little smile that to me says "oh i'm back and i'm loving it". My anticipation for his album has never been higher...

Above these very words is a low quality video of William performing his not-in-any-way-the-same-song-as-gareth-gates-released comeback single Changes. Looking fairly chilled in a v neck plunge tshirt (pink if my eyes do not mistake me) and a dapper hat, the song is a summery jazz tinged soul tune that William does so very well. I am loving the crescendo chorus with the gospel choir - it washes over you like a warming wave of sea on a hot sandy beach. It really is quite lovely. And he just looks like he is having such a good time. Ah William. How i adore thee. Plus you just know that he practically ran off stage to hug Cathy Dennis and go for some high quality wineage.

More William here...

Once again my whole plan for a proper week of posts has gone out of the window. Not that these posts aren't "proper" (they are in fact quite 'tidy'), it's just the more I push certain things back the less relevant they are! Oops. Still it's not like you come here for the stunning cutting edge news is it?! So anyway, it seems like there is lots of news and discussion around various obsessions of mine, so I shall move forward with my all important (= not important at all) take on events...

Oh Big Brother. Every year I think "oh i won't watch this year because it will be the usual bunch of society's dregs" and every year I am right but watch anyway. The clip above shows the most genius big brother task yet, but the degenerate nature of the housemates continues to be the shows pulling power. Let's break it down like this.

• Alex got booted out last week for basically being the most vile human being ever since Robert Mugabe, Nicki from BB7 and Charley from BB8...
• Sylvia took over as the house bitch, with Jen snapping at her heels. Stuart came in and provided some much needed eye candy, though Sylvia lost all her dignity and practically squizzed her lady juice all over him and then told him off for flirting with her!!!
• Jennifer also couldn't help flirting outrageously with Stuart, leaving me to feel inexplicably sorry for Dale, who btw the more i felt sorry for him, the more he became attractive - looking like a high class hooker in the above clip and rocking the classic shirt and tie look last night...
• Michael is just vile by the way. His eating habits are truly repulsive. And! Who takes a drinking glass from the kitchen into the bathroom to wash your knob after you've had a wee? I'm all for clean bits but that is going too far....

Anyway, booze and housemates = mayhem. Dennis becomes the second housemate in 7 days to be removed from the house. This is how that went down!

• Skanky MARRIED ho Jennifer got upset because while everyone was drunk Rex got water on her painting of Stuart. Which frankly made it look better. It wasn't very good...
• She went weeping to everyone despite the fact that Rex apologised far too many times and genuinely seemed contrite-ish. When really it is evil skanky whore Jennifer who should be apologising. To her husband and child, for saying she is a single mom and not letting them know she was coming on Big Bro. And literally "cumming" on Big Bro the way she rubs her thighs every time she is around StuDale...
• So anyway, skanky ho Jennifer felt violated and raped for having water splashed on her picture (surely that is a euphemism?!) and it all kicked off with vile queen Dennis getting involved and gobbing in MoFro's face...
• ...Which to be fair, may have just been an attempt to tame MoFro's absolutely intruiging and increasingly wild hair...
• ...but still wasn't very classy of him. What really would have been classy would be to not wear purple trousers and a pimp hat with a feather in it, but hey, that's the fashion impaired for you!
• Stuart, Dale, Rebecca and Syliva (as i call her) just acted despicably.

THE ANNIVERSARY:

That's far too much space spent on that bunch of reprobates. Because actually, 20 years ago this very day - as in the day you are reading this if that day is Friday 27th July - young Debbie Gibson topped the Billboard Hot 100 with Foolish Beat, thus becoming the youngest ever artist to write, perform and produce a number one single. A record she still holds to this day! In your face Tiffany :P Anyway, Foolish Beat was the fourth single from her self-penned Out Of The Blue album and my fave track from that album (closely followed by Between The Lines). If you haven't heard it, it's a rather lovely Jeff White sax infused ballad about losing a love. The extended version is rather lovely too - frankly any song that talks about a new place where dreams can't come true is beautifully melancholy and mature beyond her years at the time. 20 years later, Deborah may not have sustained the success levels of Madonna and Kylie, but she has solidly worked and produced some pretty decent albums, theatre performances, casino concerts and kiddie camps along the way. Click here for much much more DG ramblings and info :)

THE X FACTOR:

Frankly, in my humble opinion, there is nothing wrong with Kylie Minogue's 10th album 'X'. In fact, give or take a couple of songs, it is rather good. So writing a article entitled What's Gone Wrong With Kylie with a cover blurb on Attitude is a bit inflammatory and a bit presumptuous as if the world measures all that is pop by Kylie's output. Written by Peter "popjustice" Robinson, on the one hand I'm a bit annoyed by it all (Peter suggested in The Observer Music Monthly that X should have reflected more of Kylie's personal struggles) but on the other hand it's Peter Robinson and it's hard to argue with his enthusiasm for pop and passion for Kylie's career. The response to it on the PJ forums is equally passionate and I think I take the criticism against X being "kylie lost" album a bit personally - i struggled against non hodgkins lymphoma for a couple of scary years, and actually you are a bit lost when you recover thinking you should be doing something earth shattering, but actually just being glad to getting back to doing what is normal for you. Which in Kylie's case is making decent albums that aren't always outstanding but always have a number of great songs on there (Wow, The One, Cosmic, No More Rain). And to be honest, Kylie's only had 2 GREAT albums - Rhythm of Love and Light Years. marv. For more Kylie, click here...


SUBJUNCTIVE HISTORY:


God bless the History Boys. Particularly the Dakins. Individuals who have played cock-curious Dakin in the various touring casts for the excellent History Boys stage show. Dominic Cooper (above) is busy preparing for increased global stardom (he got his global platform by appearing in the History Boys movie) with his role in the bound-to-be-trashtacular movie version of Mamma Mia. He looks quite wet on the cover, and the pics inside the magazine are even more moistmaking... (He also looks quite decent in GQ!!)


Talking of which, the delicious Ben Barnes who Kirsty and myself fell in love with Ben on the national UK tour of History Boys both in Birmingham and London (not that we were stalking him or anything...) Of course, the relative unknown went on to land a role in the huge Narnia franchise as Prince Caspian and even more exciting is in the upcoming Portrait of Dorian Gray movie where he plays the titular character. I'm excited to see what these boys do next.


Back on Sunday with the charts and a new feature!

Usually the week after I get back from a holiday goes incredibly slowly - perhaps knowing that I had my romantic anniversary weekend break coming up sped things up a little. Though really that should have slowed it down again? If you follow my logic! Sigh - so few people do! Talking of random thought processes ~ Does anyone know how to get stuff from a cassette tape to an mp3? I have this tape of mega rare unreleased Deb Gibson songs and no tape player :( I'm so new millenium sound system (ie something i just shove the iPod into!) Anyway, i will shovel the last delicious bit of Galaxy Caramel down my gullet (in your face less tasty Cadbury's Caramel!!!) and get on with the weekly wrap up...

FREAKS AND GEEKS:
Oh my. It's back. The tv "phenomenon" that is Big Brother 2008 has returned to our screens. Davina is more irritating than ever, though fantastic figure! The thing about Big Brother is that it really showcases the worst of British society which in turns lets me and millions of others completely judge them without feeling guilty. This year it is the usual bunch of egomaniacs looking for fame at any cost, and of course I will be watching for all 93 days. Maybe not every day, because, well I have a life, but most days :P Here are 3 very vital points about Big Brother before i opine on the contestants (is "opine" even a word?)

1. The contestants will always be loud, aggressive, argumentative and rude. They will attempt to justify this appalling behaviour by saying they "are just being honest". Apparently honestly trumps tact, kindness, good natured, being the bigger person and decency every time...
2. The first week is always too noisy and irritating; you also have to cope with Davina being smug about the twists that she doesn't reveal at the time she mentions it. It's like popjustice putting "something brilliant we can't tell you about yet" in the popjustice almight...
3. Heat and OK magazine will try to outdo each other in terms of how much coverage they can fit into a weekly issue. Heat will refuse to give up it's alternate "skinny celebs/porker celebs" rotating front page though...

OK, time for first impressions of the fame hungry whores...

• Mario and Lisa ~ Ooo a couple. How daring of Big Brother to er, borrow the concept from countless other bbs from round the world.
• Luke likes to wear suits. He is a complete geek, ergo i am preprogrammed to adore him. His shirts aren't particularly well fitted though. OK mag will sort that out though...
• Stephanie is the first of the "i'm so pretty and amazing" girls. She is very blonde. She has to pretend to be Mario's girlfriend to pass the task. Cue Mario looking very pleased and Lisa looking - well nothing, cos her face is so botoxed she can't express. Milk either i should imagine!
• Rachel is training to be a teacher. She is so hyperactive that the poor kids will probably put her on ritalin to calm her down.
• Dale fucking loves himself. Nice leather coat tho. He is too "Brad Pitt mental in 12 Monkeys" for me, but i can imagine the right hands of FMForum readers getting very tired over the next 13 weeks...
• Sylvia. I can't even remember her but i don't think i liked her. Yes i make snap judgements. Sue me.
• Oh Jesus Christ. No, don't panic christian soldiers, he hasn't descended to go in the house. Big Brother has chosen a loud camp gay dancer to go in. He thinks he looks fabulous. He does not. Black is only slimming on slim people! (Unless you choose carefully - Dennis didn't)
• Mikey is a radio producer. And has a terrible sense of humour though that could be nerves. His poncho is fucking hideous...
• Alexandra is evil. She thinks she is inspiration because she had a kid at 15. Yes that is something to aspire to. Sadly i will never achieve those giddy heights. Quite rightly the crowd boo the shit out of her (what a vile expression) - probably for at the very least abandoning her 8 year old kid for 13 weeks (or one week most likely)
• Some chef goes in. He has a £13,000 rolex. I therefore conclude he has more money than sense. I will not be moved on this theory :P
• Oooo political, etc. An asylum seeker goes in. He is a toy demonstrator and wears a suit like its 1979. He has a wicked fro though. That beast will be massive by the time he (Mohammed) gets out...
• Rebecca is from Coventry. Which is where i used to work. Its a shit hole, but now has a starbucks so it's going up in the world. She is brilliant. Big girl you are beautiful, etc., etc...
• Darnell is an albino. I hate it when people categorise individuals by their "disability" (not that i think albinonessism is a disability PC crew) and I just did it. I am chagrinned. Not as chagrinned as the housemates should be for thinking his name is Daniel or Donald. And not as chagrinned as he should be for wearing socks with sandals.
• Jennifer is a delight. Wipe yourselves down people because that sentence was dripping with sarcasm. She thinks she had a rough life cos she is another who got knocked up at 15 and it's ruined her fun. There's a tape to play at the 18th birthday party. She hates asylum seekers who get more than she does and is probably going to get a job writing headlines for the Daily Express.
• Finally its the most delightful thing in pink since jordan squeezed herself into that catsuit for eurovision. Kathreya is from thailand and fucking rocks. She is 5ft and addicted to cookies. I freudianly misspelt that as cockie. My bad.

Let the money making machine roll on...

OTHER BITS AND "BOBS":

• The greatest dance anthem ever (aka I Just Wanna Fucking Dance) now has a nice theatre version (above) to add to it's brilliant movie video. I still prefer the movie version, but it's nice to get a bit theatrical from time to time...However, THIS version tops them all. Bur-rilliant!
• Sex and the City (The Movie) was brilliant. Nice to see the famed "credits" tutu make an appearance. Bonza. Though wallowing Carrie went on a bit too long...
• I am all about rereading the freaking hilarious Georgia Nicholson series in honour of the films upcoming release. More on that (and the films now real boyband Stiff Dylans) next week...PS also very hilarious is the ongoing chav diaries of Shiraz. Now she is in i-beef-a, innit. Surely i'm the wrong target audience for these things? :P
• I'm re-obsessed with Everwood again. Bring back the WB i say (oh they are - online). I just finished season 3 and am feeling all sniffly. Nina - pick Andy! Choose Andy! LOVE Andy! Greg Berlanti is a god...
• Same Difference have posted another cutesy adorable blog. Those crazy kids...

TOP 21 FIZZYPOPTASTIC SONGS OF THE WEEK:

21 ~ Kylie, In My Arms
20 ~ Duffy, Warwick Avenue
19 ~ David Jordan, Move On
18 ~ McFly, One For The Radio (NE)
17 ~ Rongedal, Just A Minute
16 ~ Mariah Carey, Bye Bye
15 ~ The Feeling, Turn It Up
14 ~ Ola, Love in Stereo
13 ~ The Feeling, Without You
12 ~ Madonna, Give It 2 Me (NE)
11 ~ BWO, Bells of Freedom (NE)
10 ~ Jesse McCartney, Bleeding Love
09 ~ Madonna, Four Minutes
08 ~ Blake Lewis, How Many Words
07 ~ Enrique, Can You Hear Me?
06 ~ BWO, Lay Your Love On Me
05 ~ Alphabeat, 10,000 Nights
04 ~ Jack McManus, Bang On My Piano
03 ~ Jason Mraz, Lucky
02 ~ Maroon 5 ft Rihanna, Never See Your Face Again
01 ~ Kylie, The One (NE/1 Week)

Previous 2008 number ones: The Feeling, I Thought It Was Over (4 weeks); David Jordan, Sun Goes Down (4 weeks); Jesse McCartney, Leaving (3 weeks); Madonna, 4 Minutes (2 weeks); The Feeling, Without You (4 weeks); BWO, Lay Your Love on Me (3 weeks); Maroon 5, Never See Your Face (2 weeks)