Saturday, May 14, 2011

I watched the second semi-final on Thursday night, not in the best of moods. I'm not sure why that was, but much of it was probably to do with my anger and frustration at the ineptitude of the BBC3 commentary team, particularly the appalling Sara Cox who in her opening seconds managed to alienate three quarters of the United Kingdom with her "Hello England..." remark. And all that talk about 'crazy European bands' and that pathetic interview technique, well I've got news for you Ms Cox, it's not Glastonbury or T in the Park. Eurovision is something unique and special, and deserves a commentator who manages to mix the humorous quips and the knowledgeable facts. Like....oh let me think....Paddy O'Connell perhaps? Whoever made the decision to replace the BBC3 semi-final commentator needs their head examined.

Bosnia's Ken Bruce lookalike was a little bit shaky at times, but there was never any doubt about qualification.
Austria kicked off reminiscent of Whitney Houston on "I Will Always Love You" and the result was an impressively delivered movie-ballad, although not to my taste.
Netherlands: OK so they looked like a cabaret band but I still like the song. What do they have to do to qualify?
Belgium: if it's not the worst 3 minutes in ESC history, then it's right up there with whatever is.
Slovakia: the twins that aren't Jedward, song wasn't too bad, and even though they didn't qualify, faithful travelling companion will always have YouTube.
Ukraine: a pretty girl with a forgettable ballad, ridiculous shoulder-wings and uber-distracting Mystic Meg sand-artist. Yep that's Eurovision for ya!
Moldova: Douze points from me for the cone hats alone. So what if everyone hates this song? It was entertaining and totally cracked me up. And then there was a girl with a cone on her head riding a unicycle and blowing a trumpet....has someone spiked my Quavers?
Sweden: a nation can relax and go to bed happy in the knowledge that Eric's glass broke. Vocally ok but totally lost the vocals at times and relied too much on the backing singers.
Cyprus: dramatic if forgettable song, sung by some bendy boyband types. Visually quite appealing but the song did nothing for me.
Bulgaria: this was one of my favourites of the night, Bulgaria's answer to Pink and the first sighting of a Jedward-style hairdo.
Macedonia: this had David Beckham as a backing dancer and the not entirely unattractive Vlatko shouting into a megaphone...more fodder for future ESC clip shows perhaps?
Israel: Dana Int looked great - I loved her dress - but the song was never going to match her ESC legendary status and I expected better from her.
Slovenia: this kind of Christina Aguilera style big ballad is not my type of thing at all, but I had a hunch that it would qualify.
Romania: first time I heard this I thought it wasn't too bad, however on the night I really wasn't so impressed. Amateurish nonsense from a long gone era of ESC.
Estonia: she's been to Katy Perry school. Not bad, but could do much, much better.
Belarus: still reassuringly bonkers, but not the best idea in the world to sing at ESC about how much you love your own country!
Latvia: I still like this song, but hate the outfits and their presentation of it.
Denmark: over the last couple of weeks this song has really grown on me and I was well impressed.
Ireland: the two headed Jed-monster strikes again. I have an eerie feeling that this is going to do very very very well indeed!

And so onwards to the final we go....

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