Lopez Blogs

Shayne of the Ward is back people. And frankly it's been far too long. I feel like he should be either readying his fourth album or a greatest hits by now as it's been 3 long years since he left us Breathless (and thanked our mothers for giving us birth). Let's not be churlish though - my fave X-Factor winner so far (and owner of my fave X-Factor performance ever) has returned with a gussied up version of some Nickelback tune that I've never heard of. And very nice it is too. It's available to buy on November 7th, so I will be bitterly bitterly disappointed if he isn't on The X Factor results show on the same day... let the Take That chart competition commence. Oh. And here's the video (click here to watch on youtube)!

• Oh that shayne knows how to start a video. He is topless and buff in his rather nice apartment, staring yearningly across the city. I often do the same, but with muffin toppage going on over my trackie bottoms...
• There is a girl outside who takes a quick pic of him, all pectastic at the window. In the video, this is considered romantic and grand gesturey. In real life, he would slap a restraining order on her stalkerness. The little madam.
• (Disappointingly) Shayne has put a shirt on. it's quite a nice shirt though and it's nicely fitted. so many people go for the far too flowing baggy option without even thinking of how it looks. This is probably the sort of style know how that got Shayne his job at Next.
• He takes a picture of the moon. It's quite a nice picture which means he probably has at least 8megapixel camera on his mobile phone. I'm surprised he didn't put this picture on his twitter feed :P
• The stalker girl continues to take some quite decent pictures of pectastic Shayne. 1 of 230 apparently. Blimey. If she puts them on her facebook feed, I am so going to "friend" her...
• Let's just take a moment and pause at 38s. That's quite relaxing and nice isn't it?
• Shayne gets ready to go out. He walks past his maid (how bourgois). She is of course a sexy maid, getting flirty with a feather duster. Not at all like my cleaner, Mrs. Kadrinski, who is delightful but god bless her hasn't been sexy for years...
• At around the 50s to a 1m mark, Shayne heads onto the busy streets (of London?) and manages to hail a cab STRAIGHT AWAY. This is as unrealistic as Carrie Bradshaw getting a cab with no problem in NYC. Still, the lucky cab driver gets Shayne singing his heart out in the back, so he can turn his radio down and enjoy the show. Marv!
• What a head turner! After lots of interspersed shots of Shayne singing, he walks down a street where a couple are smooching. The girl turns and has a good gaze at Shayne and does the bottom lip bite. you know the one - where you are thinking, oh I would so tap that, etc. I like to think the boy has a good look too because honestly, you can never tell can you?
• 1m40s - walking past a nice street cafe. More ladeez look. One waitress overfills a glass with water. The water gushing everywhere is clearly a metaphor for her waters gushing everywhere at the sight of Shayne. I'm still loving his shirt for some reason.
• The lyrics are actually quite romantic and the song percolates along. The director of the video quite wisely reminds the viewer at various points that Shayne hangs around his apartment with some nice scented candles looking all toned and abtastic. I don't need the reminder, but it's a nice affirmation!
• At around 2m15s, he pops into a laundrette. He seems to strike up a bit of friendly banter with some dude and then convinces the fella to lend him his clothes. Shayne Ward can charm the clothes off random dudes! I am loving this!
• He strips off in the laundrette. I mean why not? I am thinking of selling my new washing machine and hanging out in said laundrette.
• Stalker Girl is back! Shayne either mugs her or "oi no pics" her and has a butchers through her 230 pictures. Some of them are quite good. He should probably hire her as his professional photographer. I mean, didn't one of Abba have a thing with their stalker once?!
• She runs away! I would want my phone back personally! Perhaps she is doing a benny hill type "ooo chase me" routine?!
• (Turns out the cab driver was a woman and happy to be paid for her service by Shayne's voice. I am going to blog in the back of a cab next time and see if this will get me off the fare...)
• Shayne's home! Phew. Oh no! Stalker Girl has followed him in! He turns and... sort of smiles? Yes it's all fun and games until the next video where he's tied up NathanEmmerdale style in a barn somewhere!!

Oh Shayne, how I adore your return :)