Lopez Blogs

Bette Midler's recent pisstake of Madonna, her accent and her vacuum cleaning (see youtube video above) reminds me that a) her vegas souvenir cd that Dazpants purchased after her show in March is on worldwide release now and b) that due to Mr Panteloon's obsessive worship of her, I quite like that crass, filthy mouthed granny. Frankly, I'm far more musically slutty than Darren is. While he only masks his tolerance of Deborah Gibson beneath a thin veneer of contempt, I have wholly embraced his Ms. Midler :) Oh sure, I was aware of films like Beaches (sob) and For The Boys (heartwarming), and some of the bigger hits like Wind Beneath My Wings (increasingly annoying and mawkish as time went on) and From A Distance (still quite charming actually). However, in my nearly 9 years with Darren, I've learnt of lots of lovely new tunes. Sadly many of these do not appear on Jackpot: The Best Bette. Here are some of my faves (in no particular order):

1. Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy ~ long before Christina was hand jobbing with the Candyman, Bette had tapped the 40s vibe from the Andrews Sisters with her many renditions of this horn blasted catchy little tune
2. The Rose ~ not the version from the film, but the rather ace version Bette has to whiz through on her tv show "Bette" at a funeral when she is late for the Oprah show. Brilliant!
3. God Help The Outcasts ~ from the ace disney film Hunchback of Notre Dame. Hey i'm a shameless whore for ballads from Disney cartoons...
4. Somewhere In My Memory ~ from Home Alone 2, this is a gorgeous festive ballad that should've been included on her fun Christmas set "Cool Yule"
5. Otto Titsling ~ the REAL highlight from Beaches is this bawdy vaudevillian romp through the invention of the world's first over the shoulder boulder holder. Hurrah!
6. One More Round ~ more than just a throwaway opening album track, this repetitive round of hand claps and harmonies latches onto your memory after just one play. It's insanely addictive and rather brilliant.
7. Gift of Love ~ another lovely ballad and horribly overlooked single from her Some People's Lives album. Smooth vocal and a rather dreamy chorus make this perfect for some idol winner to sing...
8. Slow Boat To China ~ Bette back with my favourite 70s crooner Barry Manilow on this cheeky little lyrical tradeoff. I'm a fanilow of the Manilow...
9. Mambo Italiano ~ why this didn't have some slamming remixes like some of her other ace dance tunes such as In These Shoes, To Deserve You and I'm Beautiful Dammit, is frankly beyond me.
10. Billy A Dick - another 40s gem from For The Boys. Though for years and years, I thought the lyrics were "Billy a dick billy a dick, tic tacs. When's that kit kat coming back?" Apparently those are not the lyrics.

Tomorrow: Back to the 00s with album review of Travis and Kaiser Chiefs...